Friendship is like pissing your pants

Helping others really does help you
The only way I knew how to feel less like a victim was to take charge—by sharing my story (on my blog, at fund-raisers like Relay for Life) and raising money and awareness for cancer। It’s about my charity work and other patients and survivors I’ve met who’ve enriched my life in ways I didn’t even know it needed enriching.

It’s OK to sweat the small stuff
After I was diagnosed, I felt like I had to become a new calmed-down, centered version of myself (a person many of us wish we could be, right?). I mean, I had cancer, for crying out loud; how could I get upset about running out of milk, bats in the chimney, the outside refrigerator going out. But I did. At first I thought I was failing as a cancer patient, failing to have that new found perspective on life I thought came standard with every diagnosis. I’m over that now. Sure, it would be great if we could all roam the earth with a Zen-like peace about us. But that’s just not realistic for me. Besides, sweating the small stuff every once in a while keeps us from sweating the big stuff, the stuff we can’t always control.

Don’t keep it to yourself
When you’re going through a tough time, some may not want to burden their friends, so they say nothing and feel miserably alone. What I’ve learned: People want to listen and help; they just need a green light. So get the conversation going, make it clear you want to talk and people will respond, I promise. Discussing your issues, no matter how big or small, is the best way to cope. Like many others I lay awake some nights picturing, in full detail, the moment my cancer comes back. Then there are days I am in complete denial.

Smile at the grouchy Starbucks barista
The thing is, you never know what a person is going through, so why not be nice? I’m not saying if a person cuts in line I wouldn’t give him a dirty look. But I generally try to be kind; even a little friendliness can matter when you’re down and out. Some days, if a stranger simply holds the door for me, I feel just a bit better about my situation.

The most important thing in life is family and friends
OK, this one I always knew, but Denny, Jamie & Tammy, if you’re reading, I want you to know that I couldn’t have survived the past 7 months without you. I love you so much and feel lucky every day that you’re in my life. Thank you.

TWO more Taxol Chemo treatments to go

The past 10 Taxol treatments have been a relief compared to the other two chemo drugs. I did not get anywhere near as sick as I did on the other ones. I did however, re-lose all my hair, including eyebrows, eyelashes, etc. and my nails have yet to turn black (nor have they fallen off, but was told they could) and had (and still do at times) tingling in my hands and feet. Taxol does nerve damage. My doctors told me that. With any chemo treatment, you have to weigh the good and the bad and decide which is best for you. As for causing one to be tired, I personally think the whole ordeal: diagnosis, surgery, treatments, etc. combine to make you tired.